I think it's about time I do a little self reflection. People often look at others' mistakes when they're upset. But sometimes it's not them that's the problem...it's you. I'm realizing that I need to take a little more responsibility for my issues (not saying it's all my fault, but at some point you have to realize your own mistakes).
Relationships and romance are already a difficult matter within itself. When you add extraneous circumstances that are completely out of anyone's control into the mix, it becomes even more grueling. I've been experiencing things first hand in my relationship with Jon. Things are better in someways and worse in others. So I'm still trying to figure things out myself.
It's been difficult of course, but the hardest part is realizing I have a few hard pills I need to swallow. I need to cast my pride aside and realize that at this point in time I need to be the stronger pillar out of our duo. It's not as easy as you might think. All girls grow up with the idea that males are supposed to be the strong support system. You might think "oh, it'd be easy if you cared enough," and you'd be wrong. I thought the same thing too at first. It's not as easy as it looks being the 'strongest' support, when it means you are at 110% and the other can sometimes hit zero. It's not as easy, and if you've never been in a similar situation, I'd be a fool to try and get you to understand. Things are different now and I know that I need to gather up all my strength and be there for someone I love. I've been a bit of a let down lately and I need to learn how to own up to it. Apologizing is one of my weakest traits and has been ever since I was little. But, I'm trying to change little by little for the better.
I want to...
Be less selfish.
Be more selfless
Be strong.
Be patient.
Be understanding.
Be kind.
Relationships and romance are already a difficult matter within itself. When you add extraneous circumstances that are completely out of anyone's control into the mix, it becomes even more grueling. I've been experiencing things first hand in my relationship with Jon. Things are better in someways and worse in others. So I'm still trying to figure things out myself.
It's been difficult of course, but the hardest part is realizing I have a few hard pills I need to swallow. I need to cast my pride aside and realize that at this point in time I need to be the stronger pillar out of our duo. It's not as easy as you might think. All girls grow up with the idea that males are supposed to be the strong support system. You might think "oh, it'd be easy if you cared enough," and you'd be wrong. I thought the same thing too at first. It's not as easy as it looks being the 'strongest' support, when it means you are at 110% and the other can sometimes hit zero. It's not as easy, and if you've never been in a similar situation, I'd be a fool to try and get you to understand. Things are different now and I know that I need to gather up all my strength and be there for someone I love. I've been a bit of a let down lately and I need to learn how to own up to it. Apologizing is one of my weakest traits and has been ever since I was little. But, I'm trying to change little by little for the better.
I want to...
Be less selfish.
Be more selfless
Be strong.
Be patient.
Be understanding.
Be kind.