This post is SEDA #8
I feel like lately I've been sounding a lot like some sort of cheesy inspirational speaker. So, I wanted to take this post in a different direction and talk about my frustrations.
I know I should be happy that I have any bit of flexibility left after not having danced in over four years (and I am), but it sucks realizing my body can't do what my mind thinks it can. I've been really trying to push myself to stretch more and to improve my technique. Sometimes I feel like I want to just keep going, keep doing it a million times even when my body hurts because I just want to be better. Have you ever felt that? The frustration when you're doing it, and you know what you have to do but you just can't quite get it. Nevertheless, dancing makes me beyond happy and even though it's only been two weeks (7 classes) I can already see my muscles coming in, my body toning up and thinning out. People don't believe me when I say I have a decently fast metabolism because I'm usually pretty average in body type. What they don't realize though is that I eat 24/7 and haven't worked out in years. I still eat like crazy but I'm actually exercising now so my body is quickly adjusting. I'm very grateful for my fast metabolism.
I know I should be happy that I have any bit of flexibility left after not having danced in over four years (and I am), but it sucks realizing my body can't do what my mind thinks it can. I've been really trying to push myself to stretch more and to improve my technique. Sometimes I feel like I want to just keep going, keep doing it a million times even when my body hurts because I just want to be better. Have you ever felt that? The frustration when you're doing it, and you know what you have to do but you just can't quite get it. Nevertheless, dancing makes me beyond happy and even though it's only been two weeks (7 classes) I can already see my muscles coming in, my body toning up and thinning out. People don't believe me when I say I have a decently fast metabolism because I'm usually pretty average in body type. What they don't realize though is that I eat 24/7 and haven't worked out in years. I still eat like crazy but I'm actually exercising now so my body is quickly adjusting. I'm very grateful for my fast metabolism.
In other news, I've been kind of frustrated with Jon's absence. I don't want to sound pathetic or anything but I'm incredibly lonely. I can keep myself as busy as possible during the day and see friends and what not, but I come home at the end of the night and his absence is just so prominent. It's weird when you live with someone and have a life with someone and then they're gone. The thing I'm most frustrated by is the fact that he doesn't have much time to call or text me. I'm not big on talking or texting a lot, but when it comes to my boyfriend I am. I just wish he would talk to me more I guess.
On the bright side, he's flying me up to be with him for our anniversary this month. Before I start school I'll be spending a few days with him in Washington state. I'm trying my best to be patient for just a little longer until I can see him again. If you know me though, patience is not my strong suit. SIGH.
On the bright side, he's flying me up to be with him for our anniversary this month. Before I start school I'll be spending a few days with him in Washington state. I'm trying my best to be patient for just a little longer until I can see him again. If you know me though, patience is not my strong suit. SIGH.
DFTBA,
<3 Mo
P.S. If you missed SEDA #7 (It was a vlog) click here